Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Nature and infidelity - a venus and mars thing?


There was a report in today's My Paper (yes, yes...I read My Paper...'cos it goes well with my teh see siew dai!!), about a kinda pointless study done in the Virginia Commonwealth University about men and infidelity, and such...The New Scientist reported on it as well.

"Paul Andrews at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond and colleagues gave 203 young heterosexual couples confidential questionnaires asking them whether they had ever strayed, and whether they suspected or knew their partner had strayed. In this, 29 per cent of men said they had cheated, compared with 18.5 per cent of women.

The men were better than women at judging fidelity. "Eighty per cent of women's inferences about fidelity or infidelity were correct, but men were even better, accurate 94 per cent of the time," says Andrews. They were also more likely to catch out a cheating partner, detecting 75 per cent of the reported infidelities compared with 41 per cent discovered by women (Human Nature, vol 19, p 347). However, men were also more likely to suspect infidelity when there was none."
Kinda silly and pointless because you don't really need to do expensive research to tell you what you already could have figured out.

Considerations of love and such aside.... the females of our species are biologically more concerned about raising their offspring. Once they got the sperms they want, all they are interested in is to ensure that her offsprings are adequately resourced and can be raised safely. That's really all they need the males for. And if they are unfaithful, they are not likely to fess up and risk losing their source of support. They are also not very hung up on the fidelity of their male partners...as long as their family resources are not compromised.

The males of our species however, are really only interested in sowing their oats. If they are unfaithful they are not shy about advertising it...kinda like a badge of honour. What they are concerned about really is that their women are faithful...because they are concerned about whose children their women are bearing. Hence the fidelity of their partners are paramount.

Hence men are biologically more likely to confess their infidelity and also more sensitive to the spouses' infidelity. Women however, hide their infidelity and forgive their spouses' sins, as long as they are able to preserve the family integrity...and resources.

Common sense.

But we humans are complex creatures. We layer our biology with things like love and respect...and ideas of morality. We regard much of our biology as part of our animal and baser instincts....that have to be suppressed. What is sin but that deep dark biological urge that must be kept under control?

But it is love and morality that keeps order in our lives, and generally keeps us sane. 

Funny thing this thing called love.


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